I wrapped up a temp assignment earlier this week. I’d tell you where, but I think that’s frowned upon. I can tell you that they were very nice people and it seems like a nice place to work. The details of the assignment were mindnumbing, yet educational. Basically I spent twelve days reading over 20,000 customer reviews of car dealerships. Here’s what I learned, and what I intend to keep in mind if and when I ever buy a car from a dealership:

  1. Apparently car salesmen get LOTS of time off, but come in to close deals anyway. At least, that is the impression I get based on the thousands of reviews in which a salesman came in on his day off to help a customer. Either that, or it’s just a line they use to get people to like them. But it couldn’t be that, could it?
  2. There are a whole lot of first-time car salesmen out there. So many people were proud to provide their salesman with his first sale. Perhaps car dealerships have extraordinarily high turnover rates?
  3. Anything car dealerships list on their websites should be treated, at best, as vague suggestions. I can only assume that car salesmen, and anyone else who works for dealerships, lack even the most rudimentary knowledge of HTML. So many, many reviews involved finding a specific car at a specific price online, only to learn that the car had been sold days, weeks, or sometimes months ago.
  4. CAR SALESMEN ARE TIMELORDS. Several thousand reviews reported that dealership employees would confirm over the phone that a specific car was, in fact, available on their lot, but when the customer would arrive at the dealership they were shocked – SHOCKED – to discover that the car had miraculously been sold several days ago.

So that was my fun time over the past few weeks. Oh yeah, and The Crownless King opened on Sunday and it is AWESOME. You should all come see it, because DRAGONS.